Take 4 minutes of your day to hear this. Promise, you won't regret it.

I love that the words of a friend can bring me back to what is real, when my own thoughts are completely lost in a lie. I asked to share this poem by Daje because sometimes I just don't have all the words. I so easily forget the truth on my own. Most times, it's not that I have forgotten what is true and real; I just can't hear it over the words of other people, society, and my own feelings of self-doubt. Well what do you do when you can't hear God over your own thoughts? It's in these moments that I have found encouragement and even tough truths scattered like seeds in the people around me. Even in my stubborn and distracted state, God can refocus my understanding of who I am in his own creative way. [praise hands!]

Do you have words that you hold on to in moments of self-doubt? Please send them my way! This isn't about giving yourself a cheesy pep-talk; this is the difference between leaving room in your thoughts for lies or filling them with truth. It's kind of crucial. I would love to share your stories of success or struggle with finding your worth and identity as a woman. There is no timeline to sending these in. Just drop me a line! 

Here is one favorite truth I have pulled from this poem: 

"You can take off those shoes now. You don't need anything more than I gave you when you were born."

For whatever reason, it reminds me of Hosea 6:6--
"For I desire steadfast love and not sacrifice; the knowledge of God rather than burnt offerings."

I don't have to do or be something more than me to get love and acceptance. I must simply love.  

Thanks @dajemorris for sharing your heart! You encourage more than you know! 

​Love,

Dearest,

It comes in waves. One morning, I wake up feeling indestructible, ready to conquer the world alone. And then I watch The Vow, and I'm like "Why can't I have that?" [insert face of agony and tears]. Well, probably because I'm not Rachel McAdams, cast in a movie with Channing Tatum. 

Every situation in which I find myself alone, I start thinking I'm not enough or I didn't do enough... Clearly I'm not doing enough of what she [insert name] is doing... or maybe I'm doing too much? If you're reading this train of thought thinking, "this is my life," then yay, I'm not alone. 🎉 

But what do we do with these thoughts, and much more, the feelings that follow them? One thing to do is check them. Are my thoughts of inadequacy even realistic? Well actually, they are. It's not exactly what I want to hear, but my fear of not being enough is real. I'm not enough. People can't be enough. Relationships don't work because someone can be enough for their partner. 

I want to live in the balance that embraces my inadequacy, because I know that Christ is enough for me. By his wounds, I am healed. Forever! He redeemed a life that would have been lived entirely for myself. He sacrificed himself to cover my sin with his perfection. (Isaiah 53:5, Psalm 103:4) 

I hope every mother knows that there was never a rule that says you have to get everything right or be self-sustaining. Even when you can't be all that you want to be, his strength shines in your weakness. I've been so blessed to watch my mother turn to her Heavenly Father for strength and direction and am learning to do the same. ​

I'm just gonna admit it--I'm awful at blogging. Time and priorities have something to do with that, but also the idea that no one else really struggles with my issues, so who cares anyway. 

Well, I remember being in high school and thinking surely I was the only girl who didn't like the body she was in. I know that's not true now, and I probably knew it then; but I still felt alone in my struggle to accept how God had designed me. 

So I've decided I'm going to keep periodically showing up on this blog--when I have time and when I can drum up the courage to click post--just to send out a reminder to anyone doubting the beauty of God's design. You are wonderfully made and without flaw. 

_____

Every so often (ok, every other day?), I get the most convincing idea: If I had..., I could be happy. For a moment, I really believe it. But I am the way I am, and trying to change that leaves me angry and exhausted.

In that weary and broken spirit, I have learned to focus on God as the source of contentment... the real kind that says, "God is my judge." I don't have to have something else or be someone else. He already accepted me as I am, so no other standard matters. 

We are supplied with a barrage of "goals" to live up to on Instagram and Pinterest, let alone Facebook and TV. Hair goals, relationship goals, eyebrow goals... so many goals.
​

I remember sitting at a red light with my mom in the car one day and holding back a lump in my throat. Getting dressed had been a struggle that morning. Nope, doesn't fit. Ew, I hate the way I look in this. I don't look good in any of my clothes!  I had chosen the lesser of the two evil shirts and left the house, frustrated and fed up with my body. I finally decided to say something and the floodgates flew open. 


There I was, a freshman in college, having a middle school girl meltdown. 

I couldn't believe that I could be so immature; but my mom responded understandingly and shared her own struggles. She reminded me of a funny analogy that appealed especially to my artistic mind. Who are you to question your creator? "Will what is molded say to its molder, 'Why have you made me like this?" (Romans 9:20) 

Think about your body from an artist's perspective... There is a certain level of protection and even affection we have for the things we make with our hands and creativity. The first little test sculpture I made in ceramics class has a place on my shelf, right next to some of my favorite prints. I keep both because they are special to me! 

I love how God gives us a little taste of what it's like to be an artist. He has infinite authority over his creation. His reasons for making us in our own peculiar ways are perfect. His decision to give us a propensity for gaining weight or being stick-skinny was intentional. 

With this in perspective, how can I approach my creator's immaculate design with complaints or comparisons? I am a masterpiece. Made in his image. Anything less than praise is an insult to his creativity. 


I hope you see the divine beauty in your own quirks. You are a masterpiece. 

I can't tell you how many times I've thought about keeping this website private or just deleting the whole thing. But I've finally decided I'm not going to do that. For the longest time, I struggled with the topic of beauty on my own... not because I didn't have awesome parents who could help me (because I do) and not because I didn't grow up with people who would tell me I was beautiful (because my grandparents did plenty of that). No, despite all this, I did not talk about beauty because I was ashamed. I was ashamed of the fact that I didn't like my body. I was ashamed of my body. 

I can't help but think of the girl or woman out there who knows this feeling. I wanted so desperately to know that there was someone else out there who understood what I was going through. I wanted to know whether I was the only one with this shame, but most of all, I wanted the truth that could break it. So, I'm starting this blog, at the risk of seeming weird or self-important or immature, to share what I've learned and am still learning every day. This is for the woman who can't stand to look in the mirror. It's for the girl who loves selfies too. I have a passion to encourage and help women see themselves rightly... Through His eyes. 

Let's try this together, shall we?